dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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