It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
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