she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
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