there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
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