Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
