this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Randomize
