and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Please don't give away my fajitas
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
