I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Randomize
