Whod you bang
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
