dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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