can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
