Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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