we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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