had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I just forgot I was standing up.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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