man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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