with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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