I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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