The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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