I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Michael Bay diarrhea
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
