He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
