i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
