kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
A+ Viking dick
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize