Whoa Z and x make the same sound
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Randomize
