I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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