I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize