physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
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