I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize