in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
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