i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
