...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
