I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
Randomize
