Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
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