we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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