i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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