The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
