"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
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