they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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