i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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