it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
