If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Someone shattered a urinal.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
