Do you still have your period?
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
