I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
