Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize