I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
