I need help removing her.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
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