I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
