i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I wish you could order shots online.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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