Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
