Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
