Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
